You can’t come all the way to Australia and not say G’day mate, even if the accent you try and fake is an insult to Aussies everywhere! Apologies in advance, I’ve also learnt that it’s not “How you doin”’ in Joey from Friends style but “How you going?” here. So even before I ask you that, maybe you’re wondering about some other questions like who am I? Why am I here? How am I going? So many questions to answer along on my epic journey here, well I’m hoping it is…

Let’s start from the beginning as with any good fairytale…once upon a time in a land far, far away surrounded by the magical water of the River Thames was born a little girl in the Sauff East of London (Sauff is phonetics for South). She grew up to be much wiser, but not much taller in height and loved London so very much. Years came to pass and one day she looked over the horizon and thought where to next, the Olympics was over, another Christmas had gone but she yearned for a new adventure. That is where Australia comes in. I came to Australia the year before for a holiday and I’ve never fallen in love with a place as much as Melbourne, I felt like I had cheated on London and didn’t want to go back. It was at that time that I felt like I needed a change. It was hard to leave London, not just because of leaving our family and friends but because you’re leaving the greatest city in the world, you’re leaving a world of familiarity, where the world is your oyster…card! God I miss the tubes, so sad but true!

A year later and we’re here in Melbourne but this time it’s for real, not a holiday but to stay. Some people here have asked whether we’re crazy and sometimes I think we are but if we didn’t come now, when would have been the right time? We would have just kept procrastinating so carpe diem (seize the day) and Bob’s your uncle or in this case Bruce, we’re here in the land of Oz and somewhere across the ocean in a Chinese freight ship are the 9 boxes we shipped with our beloved Tefal pan set (150 year guarantee people) so exciting times ahead…

So why this blog, well what better way to share my exciting and even mundane adventures and observances with the world! My close friend and blogger Little Miss Awesome inspired me to go for it so credit to her awesome self.

I’ve been here more than a month now and what have I learnt so far:

1) Aussies love calling everyone ‘beautiful’ not just because they’re attractive inside and out but they’re bloody nice people – there must be a catch, when people are too nice, the synical Londoner in me comes out bigtime! Trust no one (Copyrighted by The X files)

2) There is no such thing as Winter here in Oz, they think it’s winter but it’s more like a crisp Spring morning in London so stop wearing gloves people…

3) I’m proud of my Sauff east London accent but it’s being diluted by words like “aaw yeah” instead of “init” and “nah” instead of “nope”

4) Australia wasn’t hit by the recession which is great for them but not for us, everything is frickkin’ expensive mate

5) They love British TV here thank God, never thought I would appreciate Graham Norton being on!

6) Why do Aussies call flip flops “thongs”…that is just wrong and so are hook turns and driving on the motorway at a max of 60 mph – slow and furious!

7) Melbourne is a foodie’s heaven especially for Asian fusion food, I’ve come to the right place but need to hit the gym hardcore to enjoy it.

8) Went to the cinema and they didn’t have sweet popcorn…NOOOOO!!! It almost made me leave the country…

9) Almost each house has a MTV Cribs style home cinema room which they call “Rumpus” rooms wahey, not sure what kind of movies they are watching?! And they love renovating here…they reno everything!

10) I friggin’ hate blinds on windows, I waste 10 minutes of my life pulling them down!

11) The Yarra River comes close to the Thames in river rankings…

12) Andy Murray decides to win Wimbledon once I leave the country – bah humbug but congrats Sir Murray Mint, well deserving of my insomnia to watch the match! Missed BBC commentary though, Tiger Tim and Sue Barker, oh how I miss you when all the commentators here have to say is “Andy Murray will become the first British player to win Wimbledon wearing shorts” – that is not a fun fact!

Strewth, crikey what a little bewdy of a list, I reckon there’s plenty more to come from this Sheila…till next time folks and remember it’s how you going not how you doing?!